Buying a ring is just one step in the proposal process
Boyfriend captures 'ultimate' proposal in breathtaking drone video
Watch as a woman says "yes" to a mountaintop proposal while her fiancé captures the unforgettable moment using his drone.
"Will you marry me?"
These four words make up one of the most important questions posed in a lifetime.
If you're ready to get down on one knee and propose marriage to your partner, you'll likely want to prepare ahead of time for the milestone.
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Besides picking out a ring, which can be intimidating in itself, you'll also need to decide how you'll propose, who will be involved and the most ideal date to pop the question.
Here is a step-by-step guide to help you plan the magical moment.
Do you hear wedding bells in your future? The first step is to propose — and there's a lot of work that goes into planning the proposal. (iStock)
- Make sure your partner is on the same page as you
- Ask the parents
- Buy the ring
- Plan — but not down to the nitty-gritty details
- Book a photographer
- Ask for help
- Do plan your speech but don't read it word for word
- Plan a post-proposal celebration
- Keep the ring safe
- Be prepared with a cover story
- Be flexible
- Wear the proper attire while keeping the surprise intact
- Remember there are no rules for a proposal
- Enjoy the post-engagement debrief
- Enjoy the engagement before planning the wedding
1. Make sure your partner is on the same page as you
Is an engagement really a surprise? Well, it depends.
It turns out, most people have an inkling it is coming, they just don't know exactly when. According to a 2022 report by The Knot, 29% of people said it was a complete surprise, 53% knew it was coming but didn't know when, and 13% had a feeling it was happening.
You have to make sure that you and your partner are on the same page before the proposal happens, which could raise some awareness about when the question is coming.
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You don't have to explicitly ask your partner about getting engaged and share all the details — but at a minimum, make sure your partner is open to marriage and ready for the commitment.
Are you both in a place financially to take the next step? Are you both in the right mindset for marriage? Are you ready to fully commit to your partner?
Make sure you and your partner are on the same page about marriage before you pop the question. (iStock)
2. Ask the parents
The old-school way to prepare for a proposal is to ask the parents for your partner's hand in marriage. Should you still ask today?
It depends mostly on what your partner wants and what is important to you.
For some people, asking the parents isn't necessarily an important step, but for others it's a must.
If your partner has hinted to you that asking the parents is important, don't skip it. It doesn't have to be a big, elaborate speech, but it can be if that's what you prefer.
You can also plan a day together, with you and your partner's parents, to golf, have lunch or dinner, grab drinks, etc. Taking the parents out for a casual or elaborate experience might make you all the more calm and collected.
3. Buy the ring
Before you hit the diamond district for ring shopping, figure out your budget — and stick to it.
Go into the shops knowing what kind of ring you hope to purchase. While some couples go ring shopping together, others prefer the surprise element. Get a feel for what type of ring your partner likes. Understand shape, quality, clarity, size and more.
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Does your partner wear gold or silver most often? Are they most interested in a diamond, or would they prefer another stone?
Listen in on any hints your partner may drop about preferred ring types and retain that information.
It's wise to subtly gather details about the type of ring your partner wants before making the purchase. (Ashley Garner via AP)
You can always simply ask in casual conversation. Just because you ask what kind of ring is preferred, doesn't mean your partner is going to know exactly when a proposal is coming.
If you truly can't figure out size and preference yourself, do a trial and error with a cocktail ring as a gift for a birthday or holiday.
4. Plan — but not down to the nitty-gritty details
You'll need to plan your proposal, but don't panic by needing every little item organized.
Plan whether you want to propose in a public or private space, if friends and family will be present, or if there is a sentimental location you love.
Book a photographer if that's what you want, but let the professional take the reins of the type of photos or videos captured.
5. Book a photographer
You do not by any means need to hire an expensive photographer for your engagement, but you might want to have the memory captured on camera.
If you can't afford a photographer, there is likely a friend or family member with some camera experience. Ask someone close to you to standby and grab some shots of the milestone.
Just as you'll probably want to hire a photographer for your wedding, you may want to hire a photographer to capture the engagement. (iStock)
6. Ask for help
If planning a big event or gesture isn't your thing, that's OK. Incorporate those you both love into the proposal and don't be afraid to ask for help.
Just as wedding planners assist in the day of festivities, there are people you can hire to assist in your proposal, too.
This might help alleviate a lot of stress, especially if you're a nervous person.
7. Do plan your speech, but don't read it word for word
At the moment you get down on one knee, your mind will likely be scrambling for the words you want to say. Avoid confusing by writing down thoughts ahead of time. As long as you have a simple idea of what you want to say, you'll more easily be able to ask the question.
You'll probably want to avoid reading from a piece of paper or a phone note, though. Be as present as possible and practice ahead of time.
Feel free to recite your speech as many times as you need to feel comfortable.
8. Plan a post-proposal celebration
After the proposal happens, there are many ways you can choose to celebrate. Plan according to what is the most fitting for you and your partner.
You could spend the evening keeping your news a secret, going to dinner together and telling everyone tomorrow. You could plan a post-proposal engagement party with family and friends at someone's home or a venue.
You could pop a bottle of celebratory champagne with just your parents or pets. Whatever you choose to do to celebrate your engagement in the moment is solely up to you.
A post-engagement celebration can range from a glass of champagne with your partner to a party with your family. (iStock)
9. Keep the ring safe
Make sure to keep that ring safe and out of sight from your partner between the time you purchase it to when you propose.
The longer you have the ring, the more likely it is your partner will find it.
Keep it with your parents or in a super safe place they won't think to look. Sometimes partners may get a little suspicious that a proposal is coming and look around for a ring.
10. Be prepared with a cover story
Be prepared to answer any and all questions that may arise on proposal day. If you're behaving unusually, your partner may suspect something.
Try to make the day as normal as possible, so as not to ruin the surprise — and be prepared with a cover story in the event that suspicions do arise.
11. Be flexible
You want this day to go perfectly, of course, but life isn't perfect and things may not go exactly as planned.
Don't let a little rain, an early sunrise or a mini hiccup ruin your proposal. Your partner is going to be happy to be at that moment with you, so if there is a little drizzle, it's more than likely neither of you will even notice it.
And if you do, it may make for an even better story.
12. Wear the proper attire while keeping the surprise intact
If your partner has always hoped to be in white when proposed to, this may be more difficult to plan without getting caught.
Suggesting an outfit the day or evening of may not go over so well. If they simply hope to look well put together, choose a day you know they will be dressed and ready to go.
Or pretend you have an upcoming event to ensure they're dressed accordingly.
Then, you can coordinate your own attire without ruining the surprise.
Remember that there are no rules for proposals and weddings. It's up to you and your partner to create your own unique experience. (iStock)
13. Remember, there are no rules to a proposal
Each couple's story is special and personalized to their love and taste.
There is no right or wrong way to propose. Whether you get engaged on an intimate beach vacation or on the ski lift where the two of you first crossed paths, it will be a day you remember forever. Don't worry about what other friends have done in the past, or how someone encourages you to propose.
If it doesn't suit your relationship, it might not be for you. Go with your gut and pop the question the way you want to do so.
14. Enjoy the post-engagement debrief
After the proposal happens, take time with your partner to discuss all the details that went into the day.
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Couples often enjoy talking about all the little hints they missed or how the conversation with the parents went. Remember, your partner has been totally out of the loop, so let them in on the fun secrets you've been keeping to make the day so successful.
15. Enjoy the engagement before planning the wedding
Once the proposal happens, many excited soon-to-be brides want to jump right into wedding planning.
Though it can be tempting to go straight into planning mode, take some time to enjoy the engagement and one another. The engagement is a chapter in itself, so take your time planning and enjoy the bliss of being a fiancé together.
For more Lifestyle articles, visit www.foxnews.com/lifestyle.
Ashlyn Messier is a writer for Fox News Digital.
