Yankees’ Designer Bats Lead to 20-Run Offensive Explosion

Redesigned bats helped the boys in pinstripes unleash an offensive explosion on Saturday, thrashing Milwaukee 20-9 in a historic performance.

The Yankees set a franchise record for home runs in a game, including a three-home run performance by Aaron Judge and three home runs hit on the first three pitches of the game. During the game, however, Yankees broadcaster Michael Kay revealed the reason for the team’s historic performance: They were using specially designed bats.

As Kay reported, the team analytics department looked at how shortstop Anthony Volpe hit the ball. Their analysis found that he didn’t hit any balls on the bat’s barrel. So, they moved most of the wood on the bat near the label area so the hardest part of the bat would make contact with the ball.

The result was an odd-shaped bat that was thickest in the middle.

Needless to say, the bats were effective.

Former Yankee infielder Kevin Smith praised the innovation and called it a “torpedo barrel.”

If you’re wondering whether this is all legal, apparently it is.

MLB rules state, “the bat shall be a smooth, round stick not more than 2.61 inches in diameter at the thickest part and not more than 42 inches in length.”

The Yankees’ bats fit within those prescriptions, and given their impact, other teams are likely to begin adopting the “torpedo barrel” or begin tinkering with their own creations.